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Huffle Re-Housing and Unhappiness Management Foundation (HRUMF)
Welcome, if you would like to submit a request for contact with the Homes for Huffle Sponsorship program please complete the request form below. If you have accidentally stumbled upon this website, do not believe in the existence of huffles, or are simply not aware of their existence, please close this tab immediately. We apologize for the inconvenience.
Due to the unfortunate rise of anti-huffle and/or denial sentiment we have had to enact additional safety precautions. After submitting the request for contact form you will receive an email containing next steps and a link/password for the Homes for Huffles website within 24 hours. Please note, the contact request response is not proof of acceptance into the program. It is simply a response to a request to establishing a line of communication between yourself and the Homes for Huffles Team and community. If you would like to apply for sponsorship please follow the instructions found on the Homes for Huffles website.
ATTENTION: DUE TO THE RECENT INFLUX OF SPONSORSHIP APPLICATIONS, ENDLESS BUREAUCRATIC RED TAPE, GOVERNMENT INCOMPETENCE, BUDGET CUTS, THE CONSISTENT INTERFERENCE OF HUFFLES INTO A COMPLICATED LIST OF PROCESSES, A MAZE OF TOWERING PILES OF UNPROCESSED DOCUMENTS AND FORMS, AND THE NECESSITY TO REMAIN OUT OF THE GREATER COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUS, ALL STEMMING FROM THE SECOND HUFFLE POPULATION CRISIS OF 2018, WE ARE EXPERIENCING A CONSIDERABLE APPLICATION BACKLOG. PLEASE DO NOT LET THIS STOP YOU FROM APPLYING TO BECOME A SPONSOR. HOWEVER, YOU CAN EXPECT A MINIMUM RESPONSE TIME OF 24 HOURS to #99999 DAYS. PLEASE ALSO NOTE, NOT ALL APPLICANTS WILL BE ACCEPTED INTO THE SPONSORSHIP PROGRAM. HUFFLES ARE EXTREMELY EMOTIONAL AND OFTEN DELIBERATELY MISCHIEVOUS AND/OR BLISSFULLY UNAWARE OF THE NEGATIVE IMPACT OF THEIR ACTIONS. DUE TO THIS, THEIR CARE REQUIRES AN ABOVE AVERAGE LEVEL OF EMPATHY, OPEN MINDEDNESS, LEVEL HEADEDNESS, AND THE ABILITY TO LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY. MANY OF OUR CURRENT SPONSORS WORKED HARD TO BECOME CAPABLE OF CREATING A GENUINE AND REAL CONNECTION WITH THEIR HUFFLE.DUE TO THIS APPLICANTS ARE PERMITTED TO APPLY FOR SPONSORSHIP 5 TIMES. EACH APPLICATION MUST BE SUBMITTED AT A MINIMUM OF 4 MONTHS APART FROM THE PREVIOUS APPLICATION. YOU WILL ONLY RECEIVE A RESPONSE IF YOUR APPLICATION HAS BEEN ACCEPTED OR YOU HAVE REACHED YOUR 5th ATTEMPT. APPLICATIONS CHOSEN FOR INITIAL REVIEW ARE DONE SO RANDOMLY BY A GROUP OF HUFFLES WHO HAVE AN INHERENT AFFINITY FOR RECEIVING AND OPENING EMAILS(1).
WE APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE AND GREATLY APPRECIATE YOUR INTEREST IN HELPING HUFFLES.
HILARY ROSS - DIRECTOR OF HRUMF
1. There is currently no scientific evidence to suggest that Huffles can read and/or communicate verbally. Contemporary consensus suggests huffles may not even entirely understand their own actions and/or why they do the things they do, suggestions have been made that huffles simply enjoy mimicking humans and will often do so in a greatly exaggerated and over the top way because they believe that will help them “fit in”. This can result in a theatrical performance of even the most mundane activities, such as receiving and opening mail, which can take all day and cause a “scene.” These theatrical outbursts are regarded Colloquially as “strutting.” When two huffles start to “strutt” in the same location they can get caught in an unexpected battle of “humanness” leading to increasingly over the top behaviour that often results in some unsettling situations and/or distress for the huffles involved. When “strutting” is displayed by a huffle it is best to immediately take action to stop it from progressing. Please refer to the Homes for Huffles website for my information regarding strutting and other huffle behaviors.